Blockhead switchboard operators don't listen

How many times has this happened to you? I called the telephone operator at a local facility because I wanted the phone number of their payroll office. I specifically asked for the phone number. At no time did I asked to be connected to the payroll office. I called on two occasions and both times I was immediately transferred to the payroll office phone. Of course, no one answered there so I had to call back to the main operator again. This time I literally had to plead with the operator so I could get the phone number of the payroll office and call it myself, which is what I wanted to do in the first place. My words of wisdom to anyone who answers the telephone for a living: LISTEN TO WHAT THE OTHER PARTY IS SAYING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Man's Inhumanity To Man

No post yesterday as nothing unusual happened to annoy me. Yes, Marriott screwed up my hotel reservation but I wouldn't characterize that as unusual or unique.

However, this morning I went to the bank before hours to deposit a check. Now you have to picture exactly how this went down. The ATM machine at this bank is inside the main entrance and the main entrance is ordinarily locked. The door is unlocked by sliding your ATM card through a card reader just outside the door. So this is what happened in rapid sequence. I slide my card through the reader and the door unlocks. It usually takes about a half a second between the time I unlock the door and when I actually open the door, but before that half a second elapses, a guy saunters up to the door and walks in and goes right up to the ATM machine! So not only does he get to enter the bank under false pretenses (using my ATM card), he exploits my generosity even further by cutting in front of me at the ATM machine! Ordinarily I might have said something, but the guy was bigger than me and since seeing all those excerpts of that creepy guy in "No Country for Old Men" on the Oscars, I thought it would be better to keep a low profile. You never know when you're going to encounter a psychotic (and impolite) killer at the ATM machine.

Sales tax strikes again

It didn't take long today for GOM (Grumpy Old Man) to get himself embroiled in another sales tax controversy. An otherwise lovely breakfast at the Peterson Events Center was marred by a very puzzling development. A small coffee and a bagel, which I have purchased there probably well over a hundred times, usually costs $2.99. This morning I was charged $3.10, with 11 cents added on for sales tax. After I politely asked to talk to the manager, this as the explanation I received. Ordinarily, students and staff are not charged sales tax at the Events Center. However, since the cashier was new ( a nice grandmotherly type) and did not recognized GOM as a regular there and must have thought that I was just another grumpy old man off the street, she charged me sales tax. However, I pointed out to the manager that the sales tax I was charged amounted to between 3 and 4 percent of the purchase price, which does not correspond to any sales tax rate in our wonderful city, county, and state. At that point, he was just as confused as I was and said he'd look into it (fat chance of that happening). All you merchants out there beware - GOM, the sales tax sleuth, is on your case!

Crime of the century

What follows is a diatribe on what I consider the most heinous crime one can commit - exceeding the posted item limit when checking out of the express lane. I dont know what pisses me off more - the idiots who commit the crime or the supermarkets that don't enforce the posted limit. You would think it would be easy enough to enforce. I'm sure the cash register can keep track of the number of items it scans. If you go over the limit, that's it - you are unceremoniously ejected from the premises. Actually, when I' stuck in line behind one of these jerks, I pass the time by thinking up appropriate punishments for their transgression. My favorite is that when they go over the limit, a trap door opens and they immediately plummet into the bowels of Hell.

However, I must admit that I am a little conflicted about a crucial issue with regard to the express lane. If you buy a dozen bagels, does that count as one item or twelve? There really ought to be clearer guidelines on this before one faces the possibility of plummeting onto the bowels of Hell.

Penguins blow it

The Pens got a little too full of themselves after the 3-0 lead. Too many passes & not enough forechecking afterwards. Plus their goalie outplayed our goalie. Ottawa's too good and too proud to get blown out. Oh well - that's hockey!

Can't anyone make change here?

I was getting a little worried that I would have nothing to complain about today, but the moron cashier at Chipotle Mexican Grill came through for me. The cost of my tasty burrito bowl was $6.26. I gave the guy $10.31. He gives me $4.04 in return. I then point out to him that he owes me another penny, so he cheerfully gives me another penny and slams the cash register closed. I then patiently explain to him that the whole purpose of giving him that penny in the first place was to get rid of my penny and get a nickel in return. So now I have 5 pennies and he can't exchange them for a nickel because by now the cash register is closed. Unbelievable!

Pothole Death Star

I think I know what happened to that satellite the Navy was trying to shoot down. It landed on Dallas Avenue and made the world's biggest pothole.

I saw something this morning that I have never seen before - a police officer actually helping to alleviate a traffic nightmare. You see, the geniuses at Pitt and PennDOT and the city of Pittsburgh have managed to close off all entrances to the upper Pitt campus except for Allequippa St and Robinson St. And traffic is already backed up on Craft Ave because the Boulevard of the Allies is closed. So an officer was actually holding back traffic on Fifth Ave this morning so that Craft Ave traffic could clear out. Now that was a shocker.